The Circle of Life

Dear Eleanor,

Yesterday was a sad day.  We had to say goodbye to your great-great Aunt Connie.  She was a wonderful lady, and although you only met her once, I know she loved you and your brother bunches and bunches.  I took you with me to the funeral because we are a package-deal.  You were a very good girl, and more importantly, I think you made everyone feel a little bit better with your bright eyes and wide smiles. 

Love,

Mommy

Naughty?

Dear Eleanor,

Your brother absolutely adores you.  We've been so lucky that he hasn't had any jealousy issues since you've arrived and generally thinks you're the bees knees.  I do not, however, think he would take kindly to you ruining his Christmas, which is what is sure to happen if you do not go to bed.  Santa does not go to the homes of little boys and girls who do not go to sleep.  Do you really want your brother to have a bad Christmas simply because you refuse to close your eyes for a few consecutive hours?  I'm not sure he could forgive you if you keep Santa from coming.  Christmas ball's in your court.

Love,

Mommy

Dream Job

Dear Isaac,

You're welcome to pursue any path you choose when you grow up and look for a job.  Your naked yoga moves would probably serve you well in many careers, but you might be best to keep them in the shower.

Love,

Mommy

Grammar Master

Dear Isaac,

I can't believe how advanced your use of the English language is.  First, you know that "great" and "big" can be synonyms.  You also have a handle on oxymorons.  How do I know this?  Well, you call Great-Grandma Yo "Big Grandma" which, anyone who has met her knows, is a huge oxymoron.

Love,

Mommy

Mr. Manners

Dear Isaac,

You have great manners and say "please, thank you, excuse me, and bless you" all the time.  I'm not sure you realize this, but Eleanor does not have great manners because she can't talk.  Due to this small inconvenience, please try not to get upset when Eleanor does not say, "Thank you" after you say "Bless you" to her.  It was nice how you reminded her she should say that, she just doesn't know how yet.

Thank you.

Love,

Mommy

If You Ignore Her, She Won't Go Away

Dear Isaac,

Thanks for running into my room while I was getting ready this morning to let me know that Eleanor was crying in the living room.  I'm glad you tried to problem-solve so she would stop crying, but unfortunately, just closing the door so you can't hear her crying doesn't mean she's happy.

Love,

Mommy

Squeaky Clean

Dear Isaac,

I couldn't quite understand why you were crying in the shower.  Good thing you came out and told me when you were finished.  The shower was too wet.  Makes total sense.  We'll work on that for next time.

Love,

Mommy

I Might Have to Start Using Your Full Name...

Dear Eleanor (Jeanne),

It is 10:45PM.  You don't nap well.  You may not stay up this late.  I don't care what you want to watch on TV.  It is way past your bedtime.  GO TO SLEEP.

Love,

Mommy

Something About an Apple and a Tree?

Dear Isaac,

Most people don't realize this about me, but I can be pretty sarcastic.  I'm sure that is a huge shock to anyone who's reading this right now.  In teaching, I often have to be very careful to tone down the sarcasm because I have often been told that teenagers don't understand it.  You, apparently, are wise beyond your years.  While helping me this afternoon, you turned and looked at me, and said, "You're welcome, Mommy" in a pretty sarcastic tone, before giving me the chance to say thank you.  I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. 

Love,

Mommy

Careers

Dear Isaac,

While people may have many jobs and careers during the course of their lives, most don't change them on a daily basis. So in response to your question today, "Daddy is a teacher again?", indeed he is.

Love,

Mommy

PS - But don't worry, he's not the circle time teacher.  That's all you.

Eat It

Dear Isaac,

It's pretty much understood that people eat food with their mouths.  Thanks for reminding us, by always telling us that you "eat _____________ in Isaac's mouth".

Love,

Mommy

Excuses

Dear Isaac,

At 7 o'clock every night, you get ready for bed by brushing your teeth and reading a story.  By then you have taken a shower, used your nebulizer and watched a show, so there are few excuses as to why you can't go to sleep.  You tried a new one tonight, though.  When Daddy told you it was time to get ready for bed, you replied, "I'm busy with Eleanor, Daddy."  You then told me too, for good measure.  Even your baby sister can't keep you from having to go to bed.  Nice try.

Love,

Mommy

Milestones

Dear Eleanor,

You are 4 months old today.  You have been doing a lot of neat new tricks recently like rolling and laughing, but perhaps the best trick is the one you did for the very first time tonight.  You slept through dinner.  For the first time in 4 months, I got to sit at the table for the entire meal and I didn't even have to inhale my food.  I told you four months is my first favorite baby age!

Love,

Mommy

Home Schooling

Dear Isaac,

I'm glad you love school and want to share with us what you do everyday.  Dinner time, however, is not circle time, and we're going to sit at the table and eat our food, even if you are the "circle time teacher".

Love,

Mommy

Found You!

Dear Isaac,

It's so hard to find you are when you yell, "Isaac's hiding!" from under the comforter.

Love,

Mommy

Roll-y Poly

Dear Eleanor,

You are two days shy of four months old and you rolled over (back to front) for the first time today!  Good thing I don't believe in comparing kids, because I have no idea when Isaac rolled over.  Should have started the blog earlier, I guess!  I missed it because I was at work, but Daddy sent me a picture.  It looked like you had passed out, so I was glad to hear you had rolled instead.

I'm so glad you're almost 4 months-old.  That's my first favorite baby age.  I say first, because I like each of the ones that come after it exponentially better.  Four month-olds have little (or big) personalities, and yours is smiley and chatty.

Can't wait to see your next trick. 

Love,

Mommy

Chipmunk?

Dear Isaac,

You often wander around while eating a snack and I have to wonder if I'll find food in strange places.  Whenever I ask you where your food went, you respond, "in my mouth".  After hearing this response several times this week, I'm wondering why your cheeks haven't grown exponentially.  I guess you know where it ends up eventually because you just told me that "ching (string) cheese yummy in tummy".

Don't forget to chew and swallow.

Love,

Mommy

Roommates

Dear Eleanor,

This morning, when Isaac referred to the room you will soon share with him as "Isaac's room," I corrected him and told him it was Isaac AND Eleanor's room and that you would start sleeping in your crib soon.  Isaac thanked me and told me that was "really cool, Mommy."  Please help me to remind him of this when you actually move in and take over his world.

Thanks.

Love,

Mommy

Mmm, Mmm...Gross

Dear Isaac,

That smell that you thought was good and dinner cooking last night when we walked into the basement of our building was urine.  Guess I need to work on my cooking skills if you can confuse the two.

Love,

Mommy

The Procrasta-helper

Dear Isaac,

You've been really big on "timing" words recently.  Words like "soon", "almost", "first", and "later".  Tonight I noticed that the liquid motrin had leaked into the medicine bag.  You came running in and said, "I take care of it, Mommy.  Soon."

Whenever I'm looking for something you tell me, "Find it later, Mommy."

Just wanted to thank you in advance for helping me later.

Love,

Mommy

I Don't Like It

Dear Isaac,

You finally seem to be feeling a bit better today.  No more fever, but your cough lingers on and you are getting really fed up with us making you use the nebulizer every four hours and take all of your medicines.  I can't say I blame you.  Every time I put the prednisone in the syringe to give it to you, its gross smell sends me straight back to my childhood and to memories of having to take it myself.  I remember being 4 or 5 and Grandma trying to get me to take it by mixing it in a cup of soda, thinking I would be excited to have the soda so I wouldn't mind the medicine.  It just made the medicine taste bad.

An unfortunate side effect of your illness is that you have no desire to eat anything.  Besides a few string cheeses and a bit of fruit here and there, you haven't wanted to eat at all for days.  Thanksgiving is not a good holiday for losing your appetite.  I made you a plate of all the things I cooked today - turkey, stuffed mushrooms, green beans, mashed potatoes, stuffing and poached pears - and you took one look at it and said, "I don't like it."  You ended up eating a 1/3 of a poached pear and a few bites of cookie for dinner.  Had you been feeling better, you would have gobbled up the rest of the meal.

I'm sorry you're sick, but am so thankful that we were still able to have a good day together.  Hopefully you'll be feeling well enough to go to Lancaster in the morning.  If not, don't worry, there are lots of leftovers for you to reject with "I don't like its".

Happy Thanksgiving!

Love,

Mommy

1st Thanksgiving

Dear Eleanor,

Today was your first Thanksgiving. You didn't get to really experience a genuine Field/Bassani holiday since we were stuck in NYC because Isaac was sick.  We had a low-key day here at home and just hung out together.  Even though you cried through dinner, and just now finally went to bed at 11:19PM, it was a great day.  I'm so lucky to get to spend everyday with you. 

Thanks for being you.  Happy Thanksgiving!

Love,

Mommy

Inventory

Dear Isaac,

You have been really sick.  You couldn't go to school all week and are taking lots of medicines to make you better.  You don't want to eat and I've had a hard time getting you to drink.  We're even staying home for Thanksgiving. 

I was really happy this afternoon when you finally asked for something.  You told me you wanted a juice box.  I felt bad that I had to tell you we didn't have any, especially since you finally were willing to drink something.  You, however, apparently know where everything in the house is, and walked over to the refrigerator, opened it up, and opened the butter compartment and said, "Ta da."  There were 5 juice boxes in there.  I had no idea.  Guess I know who to ask the next time I can't find something!

Feel better soon.

Love,

Mommy

Inside/Outside

Dear Isaac,

We've been working on the concept of inside and outside voices recently.  Anyone who knows me knows that it is ridiculous that I would try to teach you this concept, as I am a very loud talker.  The key to this concept for you, is that screaming can only happen outside.  Being the clever little boy you are, when I asked you where you should use that loud voice this morning, you replied, "I scream at the window.  It's outside."

Touche.

Love,

Mommy

Money for the Poor?

Dear Isaac,

While standing in line to buy your milk "juice box" at Panera this evening, you noticed the box to give donations to help people who don't have enough food.  You said, "Look, money, Mommy.  What's that?"  I explained to you that it was for people who don't have money.  Your reply, "I no money, Mommy.  Need money.  Give me (that) money."  I tried to explain that just because you had no money in your hand, that didn't mean you don't have any money.  You still would have preferred to reach in and grab some cold hard cash, but decided milk in a box was a good substitute.

Love,

Mommy

PS - Can't wait until you see your first Salvation Army bell-ringer of the season.

Wake up!

Dear Isaac,

Thanks for trying to help me wake up this afternoon by yelling, "Go away tired!" and pretending to throw it like Ben's dad does with boo-boos.  It worked almost as well as caffeine.

Love,

Mommy

You Are My Sunshine

Dear Isaac,

I haven't written to you in a few days.  I don't know where the days go, we're always so busy.  You've done some really cute things recently, though, like:

*Putting your finger to your lips to let me know that I'm being too loud during naptime.

*Telling me that you cannot help Emily, the babysitter, take care of Eleanor because Emily is helping you (by peeling clementines).

*Wondering what's going to happen to Eleanor if we are keeping each from getting lost by holding hands when we walk down the street, but she is not holding anyone's hand.

*Articulately telling me what you are doing, and then offering to "Show you, Mommy" even though I understood you perfectly.

*Telling me "You the best, Mommy!" everyday.

*Learning your last name and announcing "I Isaac Dennis" to anyone who will listen.

*Announcing, "It's 4 o'clock!" every time you look at a watch or clock.

*Introducing yourself as "Isaac William Dennis" and your sister as "Eleanor William Dennis".

*Being totally readjusted to going to school and happily walking in each day and saying goodbye with no tears.

Thanks for being such a little burst of sunshine everyday.

Love,

Mommy

PS - It wouldn't bother me to add, sleeping in until 7 o'clock everyday, if you wanted to start that too.

Night Owl

Dear Eleanor,

Must be nice to get to sleep in until at least 8 o'clock every morning.  I wouldn't know.  Isaac likes to wake up at 5.  I probably wouldn't mind so much if you would go to bed before 11PM.  I know that smiling is really fun, and that you stay up so late because you can't stop practicing your smile, but I assure you, everyone's smile would be bigger, and we could all smile at the same hour, if you would go to bed before 9.

Love,

Mommy

The Five Second Rule

Dear Isaac,

You know that I don't really worry too much about germs.  We try to keep our house relatively clean and we wash our hands often, but besides that, I'm no germ-o-phobe.  I don't even really mind the five-second rule in our house.  The five-second rule is not good for 8 hours, however.  Please refrain from eating the chocolate chip from a granola bar you enjoyed at 10AM at 6PM.  I know you're not great at math yet, and that in your world the clock always says four o'clock, but 8 hours doesn't fall within the five-seconds allotted for eating things off the floor.

Love,

Mommy

PS - Daddy asked me to point out to you that I didn't stop you from eating said chocolate chip, so maybe I'm not good at time either.

Mini-GPS

Dear Isaac,

You truly have an uncanny sense of direction.  Today, Daddy and I told you we were going to go somewhere.  You kept asking, "Where? Where? Where?", but we told you it was a surprise and that we would tell you when we got there.  You guessed we might be going to Grandma's house, but that wasn't today's surprise.  You surprised both me and Daddy when we started driving in the direction of our destination and you said, "Go to the zoo! A look animals!"  You were right!  Despite the fact that we had only ever been to the zoo once, you recognized that we could get there the way we were going, and figured out our surprise!   Guess we'll have to blindfold you next time...

Love,

Mommy

You Can't Pick Your Friend's Nose

Dear Isaac,

Have you ever heard the saying, "You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose?"  The same thing kind of goes for licking.  Just because Eleanor has found her hands and loves to lick them, it doesn't mean she would love for you to lick her.  Let's keep our tongues to ourselves, okay?

Love,

Mommy

The Name Game

Dear Eleanor,

I have loved the name Eleanor for as long as I can remember.  People often ask if I named you after Eleanor Roosevelt, since I am a history teacher.  They ask Daddy if your brother was named after Isaac Newton since he teaches Physics.  Neither of you were named after these historical figures. 

Yesterday I took you to my school to visit with some of my students and other teachers.  A student I don't know, but recognized me, came up and oohed and aahed over you and of course, asked what your name was.  When I told her, Eleanor, she said, "I LOVE that name.  It's SO unique.  How did you come up with it?"  I couldn't think of a clever response about how my father's name was Norman and my favorite animal was an elephant on the spot, so I just told her it's a real name.  She seemed surprised.  I think she's in 11th grade, I wonder if she'll be surprised in the spring when she gets to the 20th century in history class and learns about Eleanor Roosevelt?

Love,

Mommy

Wash Wash

Dear Isaac,

You have loved the idea of doing laundry for a long time.  You point out the washers and dryers every time we are in the basement of our building.  You identify every laundromat we pass on foot, the bus or in the car despite never having stepped foot in one.  You look forward to laundry day with the same anticipation most kids save for birthday parties and other celebrations.  You pretend to do laundry, improvising your lego tubs for a washer and dryer.  You proudly tell everyone in the laundry room, "I help Mommy laundry!"  I hope you still have this love of laundry in 8 years when it will be acceptable to ask you to do it.  I certainly didn't (and still don't!) share your excitement; I learned to do wash the day before I went to college...

Love,

Mommy

Long Way Home

Dear Eleanor,

We had a great day at great-grandma's house, didn't we?  Sorry about the 2 hour and 15 minute ride home.  Rain and accidents do not make for a good travel combination. I'm guessing you didn't like it, considering you screamed a good part of the way home.  Good thing we had your brother, Captain Obvious, with us.  I would have had no idea that "Eleanor's a BABY!" if he hadn't told me.  

Love,

Mommy

The Key Man

Dear Isaac,

Everyday when Daddy gets home from work, you like to play with his keys.  They're pretty awesome, what with the purple lanyard and all.   Today, you were pretending to talk to Daddy on the phone.  When you hung up, you let me know that Daddy was at work.  I asked you what he does at work and you replied matter-of-factly, "Daddy uses keys."  I knew teaching was an under-appreciated art, but that's a pretty low blow.  Daddy uses keys AND makes copies. 

Love,

Mommy

Commuter Tutor

Dear Isaac,

As a true New Yorker, you always like to get wherever you're going as quickly as possible.  When a very crowded bus came this morning, we did not board because I didn't want you and Eleanor to get smushed.  We had waited for a few minutes for the next bus when you said, "Idea, Mommy!  Let's go A train!"  You know the NYC transit grid so well that you're offering alternate routes?  It was a great idea, off we went to the train, got to school quickly, and you were so excited to be on the train that you didn't utter a single "I don't wanna school!" the entire ride.

Can you also tell me how to get to Sesame Street?

Love,

Mommy

A Distractive Influence

Dear Eleanor,

I'm writing to talk to you about your inability to stop smiling.  You smile so much that you can't eat.  Every time you start to eat, you look up at me and start smiling so widely that you stop eating.  I hope you never stop smiling.  You have the best smile.

Love,

Mommy

Number One

Dear Isaac,

I don't know where you learned to say, "You're the best!" but it makes my day every time I hear it.  It's only  7:20AM and so far you have told me, "You're the best, Mommy!" and "Super Mommy".  I'd say our day is off to a great start.

Love,

Mommy

Sharing is Caring

Dear Isaac,

It was very generous for you to offer to share your M&Ms with me today.  Or rather, the smell of your M&Ms.  I probably would have rather eaten them. 

Love,

Mommy

Gourmand

Dear Isaac,

You've always been a good eater.  I am so proud that you aren't a typical toddler in your food preferences.  You have a broad palate and will try most things.  Today on the bus, however, you requested totally typical toddler foods.  You let me know, "I wanna eat pizza" and when I said we didn't have any pizza you replied, "OK.  I wanna eat mac 'n cheese."  I explained that you just had mac 'n cheese over the weekend so we wouldn't be having it again tonight.  Then the bus passed Papa John's and you exclaimed, "Mommy!  Get pizza there!"  (The horror of a New Yorker requesting Papa John's pizza surely would take an entire post of it's own.)  You accepted that 1.  We were on the bus and 2. I didn't have any money as acceptable reasons we couldn't get pizza.  I figured I better offer you something equally delectable so you would be excited for dinner, so I asked, "Hey, Isaac - Do you want to eat broccoli for dinner?"  The answer?  A resounding, "Yes!"

I guess my good eater didn't go too far after all.

Love,

Mommy

He Who Smelt It

Dear Isaac,

Who knew the blame game began at such a young age?  While feeding Eleanor, you told me you were pooping.  When I told you that I needed to change your diaper, you were very emphatic that it wasn't in fact you, but rather your sister who had gone.  Way to try to blame the baby.

Love,

Mommy

PS - You blow your spot every time you tell me orange juice makes you poop.

Grateful

Dear Isaac and Eleanor,

It's a super scary world out there.  Bad things happen to good people.  Good people make decisions that can hurt them.  I can't promise you sunshine and roses all of the time, but for tonight, I'll hug you a little longer and give you a few extra kisses in hopes that someday it will make all the difference.

Love,

Mommy

A Rose By Any Other Name

Dear Eleanor,

I like to call you Ella Bella.  I think it's a nickname that suits you well.  Every time I call you that, I am thankful that I didn't decide to name you Betty.  Why you ask?  You are the warmest baby in the world, my own personal furnace.  This would be great if it weren't 70+ degrees in October.  As the world's warmest baby, you sweat, a lot.  If I had named you Betty, I would have to call you Sweaty Betty.  I hope that you cool off by the time you start school, or I fear your classmates will have no choice but to call you Smelly Ellie.

Love,

Mommy

Size is Relative

Dear Isaac,

This morning we packed ourselves up and headed out to get pumpkins so that you can carve them with Daddy.  We went to Stew Leonards, where there was no shortage of really big pumpkins.  You, however, were not interested in big pumpkins.  You only wanted small ones.  Instead of leaving with pumpkins that you couldn't carry if you tried, which was what I imagined we'd get, we left with two pumpkins that you can easily lift.  I guess I was thinking bigger was better, but little pumpkins are still big to you.

Love,

Mommy

Never Say Never

Dear Eleanor,

I never thought I'd say this, but please wake up!  You are getting to be a champion sleeper, which is excellent, but be sure to save some of that power for nighttime.  Isaac and I want to go get pumpkins.

Love,

Mommy

An Apple a Day

Dear Isaac,

You keep asking me for apple pie.  This, by itself, is funny, because as far I know you have never had apple pie.  Today, however, when you asked for it, and I told you I didn't have an apple pie, you suggested that we "go to Grandma's house".  Clearly the stereotype that grandmas bake has penetrated your peer group.  Or maybe you just know you can get whatever you want at Grandma's house.

Love,

Mommy

Record Setters

Dear Isaac and Eleanor,

I have to say, I am impressed.  I had no idea either of you could read.  Or that you had such a handle on sarcasm at such a young age.   Eleanor, I think you may be eligible for a Guinness World Record.  11 weeks, 3 days old and reading already.  Amazing.  Anyway, I just wanted to thank you so much for reading my blog.  How do I know you read it?  Well, Eleanor, you slept until 3AM after going to bed around 9:30 and Isaac, you slept until 7AM!!  These are your personal bests in recent history.  Clearly after reading my letters you realized I needed more sleep, too!   Don't be afraid to go for the gold and try to beat your personal bests.  No one will be disappointed.

Love,

An almost well-rested Mommy

A Vicious Cycle

Dear Isaac,

Just like flowers need water to grow, so too do you need sleep to get better.  You're back on the nebulizer for the second time in as many weeks.  Two days without naps and attempting to wake up for the day at 3:10AM (Daddy staved you off until 5:00) do not a healed boy make.  It doesn't make a happy Mommy either.  Unhappy mommies make unhappy daddies.  The cycle's a killer.  Please go to sleep.

Love,

Mommy

Nights Are For Sleeping

Dear Eleanor,

Just as I feared, your long spurts of beauty rest yesterday caused you to wake up every hour and a half last night.  I'd tell you how tired I was today, but instead, I think I'll just remind you that Santa is coming and he expects you to be sleeping when he arrives or no gifts.

Here's hoping for a better night tonight.

Love,

Mommy

The Things You Say

Dear Isaac,

You have a couple of catchphrases that you are using a lot.  They crack me up every time you say them.  Recently, you often respond "I knew it!" to most things I say, while pumping your arm to give emphasis.  You also like to "Rock and Roll!"  Thanks for reminding me when we went outside today, "Remember?  Hold hands!"  I'm glad you don't want me to get lost.

You're pretty cute. 

Love,

Mommy

Refreshing

Dear Eleanor,

Thank you for only waking up once last night.  I feel like a real person today.  You, however, seem to be sleeping the day away.  Please do not destroy this magical feeling from last night's sleep by sleeping all day and staying awake all night.

Love,

Mommy

School is Cool

Dear Isaac,

I have been worried about your lack of enthusiasm for going to school in the morning.  Your repeated cries of "I don't wanna school!" made me wonder if you were unhappy there or if something had happened.  When I asked you after school one day last week why you had cried that morning, you responded, "It's funny".  I guess that should have been my first clue that you were fine. 

Today's drop-off kind of sealed the deal for me though.  Before we left, I promised you a treat when we get home this afternoon if you didn't cry when I dropped you off.  You've cried every day you've been back so far.  With the promise of an unknown-to-you treat, however, there was not a tear to be seen.  I wonder if I can get away with giving you an apple?

Love,

Mommy

Dandy, but No Yankee Doodle

Dear Isaac,

For the last week or so, you have excitedly pointed to the news at random times and exclaimed, "Daddy!  Work!"  I couldn't figure out why you thought you were seeing Daddy's school on TV.  Until today.  You were sitting in the living room and again said, "Daddy! Work!"  and I looked up and there was Yankee Stadium on the news.  Now, Daddy's no A-Rod or Jeter, but you're right.  We DO pass Yankee Stadium every time we pick Daddy up from work.  Your geography skills are far superior to mine.

Love,

Mommy

Wait Until the Sun Comes Up

Dear Isaac,

You are not old enough to have a paper route, so I cannot fathom why you think 3:45AM is an appropriate time to wake up for the day.  If you truly love us, you will never do this again.  Christmas is coming.  Just sayin'.  Santa's watching and things aren't looking too good for you.

Love,

Mommy

Personal Shopper

Dear Eleanor,

You are my new favorite shopping companion.  I have not really gone shopping for myself since Isaac was born, but today, with your help, I managed to buy lots of stuff just for me.  You're a little young to enjoy spending 5.5 hours at the mall on a Saturday, but you were very helpful in telling me what looked best.  You didn't even ask me to buy you anything.  You are welcome to shop with me whenever you like.  Or until you can walk and talk.

Love,

Mommy

Lessons from Yo Gabba Gabba

Dear Isaac,

While I know Sesame Street and the Fresh Beat Band are your current favorite shows, I think we need to go back to Yo Gabba Gabba and the important lessons it teaches.  Remember the "Don't Bite Your Friends" episode?  Clearly you did not at today's playdate.  It's never okay to bite.  Even if you're really tired.   Or you really want to play with something.  Or someone takes the toy you're playing with.  Or you're really excited about being at the circus with Grandma and Grandpa.  Okay, okay, that was me, but still.  It's too early in the season to lose our playdate privileges. 

Love,

Your Embarrassed Mommy

The Small Stuff

Dear Isaac,

I was going to write you a letter about the fact that it is unacceptable for you to wake up at 4AM for any reason, even if you "wanna potty".  I was going to tell you how your sister didn't sleep well last night either and that this makes for a cranky Mommy.  I was also going to tell you that it's probably unnecessary to flip out about wanting to take the train to school once you've happily arrived there by bus. 

I got an email this morning with some pretty yucky health news about a friend of a friend.  Instead of telling you all of the things I was going to tell you, I'll instead say, I'll take the 4AM wake-ups, sleepless nights and tantrums any day in exchange for good health.  No need to sweat the small stuff. 

Love,

Mommy

Point Taken

Dear Eleanor,

I just wanted to let you know that I received your memo RE:  Mommy Napping While Eleanor Naps and Isaac is at School.  I now clearly understand that you have no interest in me napping while you nap and that you find it offensive when I try.  After trying to get a little nap in all morning and being awakened by you every five minutes, I gave up my fight when you finally fell asleep and decided to be productive.  I hear you, loud and clear, napping is not an appropriate activity while you are sleeping, however, I can feel free to vacuum, organize drawers and do any other form of necessary housework.  I hope your Daddy didn't put you up to this.

Love,

Mommy

The Screamer

Dear Isaac,

Today was not our best day.  I kept you home from school because I wasn't sure you were at 100% yet.  You spent a lot of time yelling at me.  Now, some of your fans might say, "Oh, he doesn't know what he's doing he's only two."  You would smile your cute smile and think no one was on to your game.  You sold yourself out, however, when Daddy asked you why you screamed at me and you responded, "I want go to park.  I want get dressed."  These were the exactly reasons you were screaming.  While neither is unreasonable in and of themselves, you demanded both at 5PM.  Perhaps if you had been willing to get dressed at 8AM, when I tried to get you to change out of your pjs, the rest of the day would have gone a bit better.

Love,

Mommy

Say My Name

Dear Eleanor,

I can only hope that you smile and get all excited when Daddy tells you to, "Say Da-da," because you know that it will never happen before you say, "Mama".  Maybe it's a little inside joke you and I have.  I mean, I fully support your 1st Amendment rights and happily encourage you to say whatever you'd like, but I'd hate to see you bite the hand that feeds you...

Love,

Mommy

Deep Breaths

Dear Isaac,

Last night was pretty scary.  You had your first (and second!) asthma attack.  Even though I hate trauma of any kind, I'm alright with asthma, since I had it as a kid too.  We are lucky that you have such a wonderful doctor and that she is always on call (literally, ALWAYS - she's in private practice by herself).  We're also lucky (?!)  that you have had respiratory problems before, so we already had the medicines and nebulizer here and didn't have to go to the hospital.  You didn't like the nebulizer at all when you were younger, but now that you are older and a super helper, you don't mind helping the fish (-shaped mask) eat his food.  You're such a big, brave boy.  That makes me breathe easy.

Love,


Mommy

Beauty Rest

Dear Eleanor,

I'm not trying to give you a complex, or make you self-conscious at such a young age, however, those bags under your eyes would go away if you'd go to sleep.  Just sayin'.

Love,

Mommy

Let Me Tell You

Dear Isaac,

You sure had a lot of things to tell me today.  First, you told me twice that you needed to use the potty and you did!  This is pretty amazing, considering we've taken no steps in potty training you.  Thanks for taking care of it yourself.  While on the potty, you spent a lot of time telling me "I have penis".  Another true statement. 

When you asked to go to the bank after seeing an ad in Time magazine with coins on it, and I refused, you instead offered the option for us to go for a haircut.  Very clever.

I'm not sure yelling at Eleanor to "Stop crying!" is the most effective means to that end, but it sounded nice when you added "please".

And finally, thanks again for telling me what a good cook I am at dinner.  You're right, I can order a mean pizza.

Love,

Mommy

Trick or?

Dear Isaac,

Most people think that treats are things you get infrequently for a job well done or a special occasion and are generally nutritionally void.  You however, have given "treat" a new meaning.  I love that you are willing to call most things you eat treats, no matter what their nutritional value.  As a result, you are welcome to all of the "apple treats" and "banana treats" you like. 

Love,

Mommy

PS - Please don't discuss treats with your friends at school.  I fear if you do you they will have new meaning for you.  I'd hate for you to be disappointed.

Drive on, Jeeves

Dear Isaac,

I fear you're turning into one of those Manhattan kids they make television shows about.  The MTA subway system is not our own personal chauffeur.  The A train takes anyone who wants to ride, up and down 8th Avenue and into Brooklyn all day.  While the train is always available for us to use, it's not only for us, therefore, you needn't cry when the train leaves the station after we've gotten off.  It will come back next time we need it.

Love,

Mommy

Fashion Choices

Dear Isaac,

Although we tend to prefer our clothes to be stain and rip-free, some people like that kind of thing.  The lady on the bus this morning had holes in her jeans on purpose.  She must like them that way.  I'm glad she didn't realize what you were talking about when you kept pointing at her jeans and saying, "Look, Mommy!  Oh no!  Look!!!!"  Think of it as built-in air-conditioning.

Love,

Mommy

Healthy and Happy

Dear Eleanor,

Today is a rough day for you.  You had your first vaccinations - 3 shots and an oral dose.  You are not your usual happy self and are probably wondering why I would ever put you through this.  I promise, never getting the diseases for which you were vaccinated against is the ultimate payoff.  I will do my best to stay patient while you get over the shots, but if you could find it in your heart to be miserable only until 11PM, I would really appreciate it.  My nerves can't take this all night.

Love,

Mommy

Investing in my Sanity

Dear Eleanor,

I have decided to reclaim my sanity.  Everyone will be happier this way.  Your brother will love this as it means he gets to go back to school three days a week.  While this is an easy solution that will make many of us very happy, I might be even saner if I could employ a wet-nurse for you, my insatiable little lady.

Love,

Mommy

PS -  I speak from experience when I say there's usually a tomorrow, so you need not eat like there isn't.

Catchphrase

Dear Isaac,

You have become so verbally expressive.  Perhaps the very best example is a phrase you picked up just the other day and have embraced as a keystone of your vocabulary.  There's no hiding your disappointment about bedtime, naptime, or any other time you don't get to do exactly what you want when you exclaim, "Oh, man!" with exasperation.

Love,

Mommy

People People

Dear Isaac,

Daddy and I are people people.  Anyone who knows us knows that we love to talk and will do so to anyone at anytime.  Even to total strangers.  It should come to no surprise to us, then, that as you and I were leaving the grocery store, you proudly waved your little hand back and forth, announcing, "Bye, people! Bye, people!" 

You're so cute.

Love,

Mommy

Sneaky Pete

Dear Isaac,

I'm so glad you've learned right from wrong at such a young age.   Here's a helpful hint:  If you want to do something you know you aren't supposed to, like climbing on your table, it's probably not a good idea to flip out when I come into your room, yelling "Go out room, Mommy!  Go away!"  It tends to draw unnecessary attention to your antics and therefore it becomes impossible for you to try your death-defying tricks. 

Love,

Mommy

PS - You can tell me to get out of your room whenever you want to.  Unlike Eleanor, I am not omnipotent, so it really helps with my parenting to know you're about to do something you shouldn't.

Sound is Funny Like That

Dear Isaac,

You are such a friendly little boy and love to narrate what you see happening around you, or tell people what you know.  Here's a helpful hint - when there are 5 mommies sitting in a circle and you are standing in the middle, they can all hear you.  Therefore, you needn't go up to each of them individually to tell them that "Daddy go a work, a get money". 

It's cute anyway.

Love,

Mommy

The Park is More Fun if You Sleep in a Crib

Dear Eleanor,

I know you're probably not thinking about all of the fun you'll have at the park in the spring when you can hold your own head up, but trust me when I say, the park is more fun if you sleep in a crib.  Your brother shared your affinity for sleeping in the swing-  until he was 8.5 months-old, in fact.  As a result, every time we went to the playground, he would fall asleep in the swings, instead of having fun like the other kids.  You don't want to be that kid.  Other mommies will laugh at you (and by default, at me).

Love,

Mommy

Superpowers

Dear Isaac,

You are a very smart boy.  You know all of your letters and can even identify which letters some words start with.   Not to burst your bubble, but this does not mean you can read.  Therefore, it seems a little implausible that you can't sleep because the "bunny book" (Guess How Much I Love You) cannot be found and therefore you cannot take it to bed with you.  Even if you can secretly read, I very much doubt you have the ability to read in the pitch dark. 

Love,

Mommy

Tim Is Also My Doodlebug/"Tuck In!"

Dear Tim,

Isn't it annoying how Isaac asks to be tucked in 5-6 times before going to bed at night?  Especially when you're trying to get work done, or I'm trying to soothe Eleanor?  At least after awhile he goes to bed.  I don't think, however, telling a two year-old "I'm not speaking to you", is easily understood.  That answer doesn't negate his request at all.  He doesn't want to speak to you.  He just wants you to "Tuck in, Daddy".

Love,

Isaac and Eleanor's Mommy

The Most Wonderful Time of the Day

Dear Eleanor and Isaac,

It is unacceptable to be awake for 3 hours in the middle of the night and it is equally unacceptable to wake up for the day at 4:30AM.  Therefore, I have no choice, but to announce to the world (or my 7 readers) that naptime is my favorite part of today.  Hopefully tomorrow my favorite part of the day will have something to do with spending time with both of you.  Maybe we'll even change out of our pajamas.

Love,

Mommy

Etiquette

Dear Eleanor,

When guests travel from hours away to meet you and spend time with you, it is generally considered good manners to stay awake for a least a small portion of the visit.  It is also good manners to spend time awake during the day so that both you and Mommy can get some sleep at night.  Just a couple of things to consider.

Love,

Mommy


Dear Isaac,

People in most social circles prefer their hosts to wear pants.  Therefore, when we have guests visiting, it is not ideal to use your charm to lure them into your bedroom and then remove your pants.  While it was adorable to hear you tell Angela, Nadine and Char to "Come, people!" so that they would go into your room, taking off your pants to celebrate their presence was not.

Love,

Mommy

Frenzy

Dear Eleanor,

If your current eating habits are in any way similar to the habits you will have later in life, I fear we will not be able to afford to keep you.  Six meals in three hours is a lot, even for the most generous wallet.

Love,

Mommy

What doin', Mommy?

Dear Isaac,

If I had counted, I am almost sure that I have answered the question, "What doin', Mommy?" no less than 150 times today.  This has something to do with your penchant for asking said question many times in rapid succession.  Henceforth, to preserve my sanity, and truly answer your question, the only way I will be able to respond is, "Answering the question 'What doin', Mommy?'"

I just tried this response and it seems to be acceptable, as instead of asking the question again, you just said, "OK" and then asked Daddy, "What doin'?"

Rachel

Re: Zzzzz

Dear Eleanor,

I was being facetious.  I really wanted more than 10 minutes of sleep.  Thanks anyway.

Love,

Mommy

Zzzzzzzzz

Dear Eleanor,

It's 8:45PM and I am going to bed.  I assume you know this already.  If you can find it in your heart to let me sleep for at least 10 minutes before waking up I will be eternally grateful.

Love,

Mommy

Top Chef?

Dear Isaac,

I really love how you compliment me during every meal by telling me I'm a "good cook, Mommy! yum, yum" multiple times.  In the spirit of full disclosure, however, I must tell you that your compliments at lunch today would have been more appropriately directed towards one Mr. Frank Perdue, as he concocted your chicken nuggets.  All I did was push a button on the microwave.

Love,

Mommy

Your Future Is Bright

Dear Isaac,

You may have a future in investigative journalism or criminal justice.  I believe your repetitive lines of questioning would get you any answer you desire.  Today, you asked, the following questions innumerable times:

"Where's Eleanor?"

"What doin', Mommy?"

"Where Daddy go?"

"Where ball go?"

"Where'd friends go?"

If I had a dollar for each time I answered those questions today, I wouldn't need a part-time job.  I'd be independently wealthy.  Your future is bright.

Love,

Mommy

PS - One of the mommies from playgroup found your ball.  She's going to bring it over tomorrow.  You'll have to find a new question for your collection.

Hey Good Lookin'

Dear Eleanor,

I am so glad you have found your smile.  It is beautiful.  I hope it's always as pure as it is today at 6.5 weeks old.

Love,

Mommy

RE: Getting To Know You

Dear Eleanor,

Please disregard the letter from Sept. 18 about how well you know me.  You have shown that you know me perhaps better than anyone else in the world.  Maybe even better than I know myself.  If this weren't the case, you wouldn't have such an uncanny ability to wake up either exactly two minutes before I go to bed, or two minutes after.  Clearly an alarm clock is unnecessary.  You are omnipotent.

Love,

Mommy

Your Sister is Neither a Footrest Nor a Pillow

Dear Isaac,

You know that after making sure you are safe, it is also very important to me that you be comfortable.  However, it is also important to me that your sister remains unharmed while you are comfortable.  Therefore, please note, your sister is neither a footrest nor a pillow and would prefer not to be treated as such. 

Love,

Mommy

Getting to Know You

Dear Eleanor,

I feel like you haven't really gotten the chance to know me.  Please believe me when I say I am much more pleasant when I get more than 3.5 hours of sleep.  I'm guessing you are too.

Love,

Mommy

Riddle Me This

Dear Isaac,

Puzzles and riddles are great fun, but please note, I will never speak in code when I want you to do something.  For example, if I am making your lunch, and Eleanor is crying and I ask you to sing her a song to make her happy, I am not actually asking you to cover her face with a blanket.

Love,

Mommy

If I Knew Picasso

Dear Isaac,

I don't mean to stifle your creativity, however, crayons are to be used on paper.  We like our doors and walls just the way they are.  I'm sure Picasso's mom would have stopped him from coloring all over the house too.

Love,

Mommy

Bribery Makes for Effective Parenting

Dear Eleanor,

If you go to sleep, I'll buy you a pony.

Love,

Mommy

Catch!

Dear Isaac,

I love that you love your sister so much.  However, she cannot play basketball with you yet, especially not when she's eating, so please refrain from passing her the ball.

Love,

Mommy